Changing your mind set...

Today I was shown an amazing amount of kindness, the start of the day wasn't that great to be honest. The start of today had my anxiety up, and the hair on the back of my neck tingling. So until about three in the afternoon my day was kinda ass. 

I decided to get my big girl panties on so to speak, and be a damned grown up and buck up. I could have allowed my stupid backwards thinking to ruin what was a beautiful and fun filled evening with my hubby. Which mind you  he actually twitched one of his days off for today just so we could spend our anniversary together. That is not easy to do when you are in the military, therefore he went the extra effort to do something sweet for me. 

So I went out into the living room while he was napping, and decided to put on makeup. Slowly but surely the more makeup I put on the better I started to feel, then picking out the clothes i was going to wear. Started getting excited at the prospect of a fun time, doing whatever... I woke him slowly standing on the bed, with a bright smile and a giggle. His face lite up instantly and he held out is arms asking me to come for a cuddle, his breathless words of your so beautiful melted my heart. He is my other half, he is the light in the darkness, the voice of reason. He is everything I prayed for and more. 

So once I started taking pictures of the outfit I put on, I slowly started feeling sexy.. pretty.... confident. Going out with him we went to Lowes thinking of the things we needed to purchase when we moved to his mothers house the end of next month. A small fridge, some *better* locks for the doors, a rug ect. Just little things that will make our new home fun for us. I enjoyed him just talking to me, btw wtf is it with Lowes and being shocked. I swear to God we must have shocked each other over 50 times. No matter what we touched zap... zap.. zap zap.. it was insane. But it was fun for like the 40 ish minutes we were there just mulling about. 

We decided to head to chevys I loooooooove tex mex, and Mexican food in general. So we decided to share a plate, we can do that now that I don't eat much due to RNY. So he always says I am a cheap date, we got the mixed fahetas, shrimp, steak, and carnitas. It was good I didn't eat much due to the fact I stuffed my gullet with alcohol and got hammered lol. Matthew seems to enjoy me getting rather wasted fast, as I become sweet and cuddly. Also apparently I like to try and remove my clothes for "business time" while still in public. ..... uh yeah so he decided to take me home. 

I looked on facebook after posting my pictures, and the overwhelming amount of kindness was crazy. To see so many postitive and wonderful comments on my pictures. Made me feel amazing, I have never once in my life felt pretty, or sexy until the last two months of my life. I never used to want pictures of me taken, or to wear clothes that were tight enough to see my figure. I wouldn't dare be in the spot light, or try to shine. 

Those dark days are over.. Moral of this blog is to explain to you, that you choose to have to a bad day. Having bad moments of course are going to happen, but you cannot let those negative feelings rule and ruin the rest of your day. Fuming and being depressed over something all day will never fix anything, it will never make the problems go away. It will only exacerbate them, and bring down anyone else who you come in contact with. Had I not changed my mindset, we would have never went out. We would have fought all day, and missed my chance on the enchanted evening I did get to have. I am so thankful sometimes for the patience this poor man has for me. Because anyone else would have ran screaming a long long time ago. 

Thats all for tonight my pretty little losers... from your favorite Villainess N.